It Doesn’t Take Much August 13, 2010

Two things happened yesterday that feel sort of like milestone moments.

I like milestone moments. Mostly because I’m a ceremony whore and like believing that almost everything is a big deal on some level. So you might not agree that these two things are milestones of a sort, but I do, and that’s really all that matters.

1. I joined OK Cupid. This is even by my standards a relatively minor milestone, but it counts. It signals an official acknowledgement that I’m ready and willing to date. Not just to date, but to endure the particular…um, let’s call it adventure, that is on-line dating. But I have to admit that OKCupid is kind of fun.

First of all its free, so no pressure to get an ROI.

Second, it doesn’t take itself very seriously, so there are very silly questions and weird tests you can take to see what your dating personality is.

This is mine: 

Loving, hopeful, open. Likely to carry on a romance from afar. You are The Window Shopper.

You take love as opportunities come, which can lead to a high-anxiety, but high-flying romantic life. You’re a genuinely sweet person, not saccharine at all, so it’s likely that the relationships you have had and will have will be happy ones. You’ve had a fair amount of love experience for your age, and there’ll be much more to come.

Part of why we know this is that, of all female types, you are the most prone to sudden, ferocious crushes. Your results indicate that you’re especially capable of obsessing over a guy you just met. Obviously, passion like this makes for an intense existence. It can also make for soul-destroying letdowns.

Your ideal match is someone who’ll love you back with equal fire, and someone you’ve grown to love slowly. A self-involved or pessimistic man is especially bad. Though you’re drawn to them, avoid artists at all costs.

And apparently, I should consider these types of men:

Steady & mature. The Gentleman.

For anyone looking for an even-keeled, considerate lover, you’re their man. You’re sophisticated. You know what you want both in a relationship and outside of it. You have a substantial romantic side, and you’re experienced enough sexually to handle yourself in that arena, too. Your future relationships will be long-lasting; you’re classic “marrying material,” a prize in the eyes of many.

It’s possible that behind it all, you’re a bit of a male slut. Your best friends know that in relationships you’re fundamentally sex-driven. You’re a safe, reliable guy, who does get laid. In a lot of ways, you’re like a well-worn, comfortable pair of socks. Did you ever jack off into one of those? All the time.

Your ideal mate is NOT a nut-job. She is giving and loving, like you, but also experienced.

I know – so accurate its scary, right?

There is also this thing called “quick match” which is where you are given profiles but no names and you rate them on a scale of 1-5. If you rate them a 4 or a 5, the site will contact them and see if they rate you a 4 or a 5 too. It’s a virtual version of the childhood ritual of passing a note that says “I like you. Do you like me? Check Yes or NO.” Its quaint.

Third, some of my girlfriends are on it too, so we can sit on the phone and laugh together at the bad pictures and stupid profiles. Which takes the elementary school note passing experience and upgrades it to high school yearbook mockery. Good times.

I have nothing to show for my efforts yet, other than these small moments of amusement and a mental pat on the back for taking the leap, but it hasn’t even been 24 hours yet. For some reason I’m particularly drawn to two guys who are only in DC part-time. They feel like a good starting point for getting into this game again…

2. I was hired as a paid blogger by a marketing company. I think most people will agree (other than maybe my Grandma), that this is the more significant of the two events. It was sort of a fluke – I saw an ad on Craig’s list, sent a note asking for more info, was given a test assignment, told my work was A+ quality (which instantly set off my bullshit meter, so I did a bunch of research on the company, but apparently it’s legit), and I was sent a list of companies and a schedule for producing blogs for them. It’s basically 300-500 word advertisements for these companies, but whatever, I can make around $100 a week. The really awesome thing about this particular milestone is that it marks the first time I’m getting paid for something I wrote. It’s a significant step toward me a)taking myself seriously as a writer, b)earning a living as a writer c) being able to go to Europe this spring while still being able to eat and have a life until then. And it’s actually kind of fun and interesting researching different details about these industries and finding a way to make it look like I’m not shilling for the company but still making at least 3 references to the company.  So far today I’ve written two blogs about media purchasing companies. I’m going to be an expert pretty soon.

I’ve honestly been feeling a little like I’ve been treading water in my life for the last few months. Probably because I’ve just been treading water 🙂 Which was fine for a while, I needed to regain some equilibrium in my life. But for the last couple of months I’ve been getting bored and antsy to have something, anything really, change in my life. I’m done treading water, I’m ready to swim. But only in the shallow end, and with floaties.

But at least I’m finally in the pool.